Don’t be fooled by her beguiling smile, she clearly and wantonly disobeyed my order to stay clean until Thanksgiving! I cleaned the house, I cleaned up the yard, hell…I even cleaned out the refrigerator to make room for the bird! All I asked of Pearl Bailey was KEEP YOUR SELF CLEAN!
Listen, the autumn temperatures down here – cool mornings, warm days, cool evenings – I get it – she is enthralled to spend time down in her Shangri-La (her earthly paradise.) But is it asking too much for her to refrain from rolling in dirt?
Why oh why, did I get this rough and tumble tom-boy instead of the dainty, femme fatale I longed for? Pearl Bailey’s behavior is out of control. Seriously, you should have seen how grimy the paper towels were when I wiped her face. I used up more than half a roll!
At least she likes getting a facial!