Category: Antics of Pearl Bailey

More rain predicted for the Suncoast late this afternoon, and I must tell you all this deluge is leading to my boredom. Being bored, to me, is a near-death occurrence. I would rather walk barefoot on hot coals than let boredom settle in on me!

With the sun shining through the clouds that are rolling in, I felt safe in unleashing the hounds. All was well down in Shangri-La for Pearl Bailey and Ella, until it wasn’t. Even though a good deal of quiet time passed without any disturbance, I gave it little concern. Big mistake.

Deciding to check on my brood, I began the ‘calling-to-come-in’ routine. I call this act my ‘parade of stars’ – like a ringleader, I call out and my animals line up! (Hey, c’mon…I do live in a circus town after all.)

My first try produced a result, only it was not the particular result I was expecting. Pearl Bailey, in all her glory, came sauntering in looking like she was auditioning for the lead in Phantom of the Opera. And, did I mention she was quite proud of herself?

I guess in a way, I can’t blame her; maybe – just maybe – she has a thing for boredom also! Either way, this gal sure knows how to keep herself entertained, that’s for sure!

Our island is graced with age-old oaks and palm trees.   There is a certain squirrel that lives in the Live Oaks that wind around our property. This squirrel is Pearl Bailey’s nemesis.

Most squirrels pay no mind to silly dogs, but this squirrel…well; let’s just say he is cunning and of a devious nature. It is clear to me from my observation that this fella’ is out to torment Pearl Bailey on any given opportunity presented to him. I have heard him squawking and witnessed him running the entire fence rail with Pearl Bailey frantic hot on his heels! I have seen him leap from palm to palm while seemingly calling to Pearl Bailey, fueling her anguish! This dude is a real trickster.

I watched from the screen porch today as their dramatic performance unfolded. I took these shots of Pearl Bailey smoking him out…and had some fun in the processing of the photos!

Really folks, this is live entertainment at its finest!

It is hard to find the words when you wake to hear of not one, but two, senseless acts of random murder. Pearl Bailey and I are usually the first to wake on Sunday morning. This morning was no different. We descended the stairs at the same time, and as I stumbled to make coffee, Pearl Bailey took to her outside domain to do her business.

Once each task had been completed, we both settled on the sofa as I switched on the morning news. I somberly absorbed the account of two different cities under siege from the rampage by white nationals, my hand placed over my mouth most of the time while listening.

As I spoke out loud to the TV in anguish and disgust, I noticed Pearl Bailey listening intently. Her eyes were transfixed on the screen. She was definitely picking up vibrations from my shivers. It was a special moment that we shared. And, I am glad she was the spirit with me in that very sobering hour.

For the love of God!  This is how I found her this morning.  Pearl Bailey in all her glory. But I cannot blame her, the sun is shining for the first time in ‘like-forever’, and it is proving to be a glorious day indeed.

Southwest Florida’s rainy season is throughout the summer months. It is customarily referred to as Hurricane Season, but if you are a Floridian or even a transplant, you never refer to it that way.

We have had a slew of sloppy days lately, so the sunshine rousting us this morning was a sight to see!  Waking up in a good mood is so propelling.  You can’t help but grin ear-to-ear when the sunshine returns after a long hiatus.  Pearl Bailey apparently was on the same wave-length, I guess we vibe off of each other.  Seeing her in her merriment just left me chuckling.  What a great way to start the day!  Happy Saturday!

I recall an often heard refrain from my youth. Mama would say,”Make your bed!” I always complied. To this day, I make my bed upon rising, unless of course I am not the first one up, then the Professor makes the bed. (I gave him good home training on this one!)

Why am I telling you all this? Because, as evidenced by the attached photo, Pearl Bailey, apparently believes that beds needn’t be made at all.  For any afternoon that I go upstairs to retrieve something, she beats me up the steps, and poses smiling, seemingly satisfied with the newly arranged and disheveled  bed coverings.

She doesn’t even look remorseful, does she?

Demon girl! Mama would definitely not approve!

Oh, how I struggle with Pearl Bailey and her incessant desire to be one with any pile of dirt she encounters. Now, that being said, I still endeavor to keep her clean. But I confess to you, I’m a failure at that task, Pearl Bailey sees to that! It is not because she doesn’t understand, believe me, she knows! Owning an intelligent dog is a not only a challenge, in this case it is very tricky! Miss Pearl Bailey is one smart dame.

It rained steadily last night, so when I let her out this morning I knew fully well that I was taking a big gamble. Even through my morning fog, I held strict discourse with her — ‘don’t go near the mulch beds, don’t get into any puddles, do your business and come right back in’. Out she went tearing down the steps in a burst of speed envied by any Indy car driver. Ten minutes later she appeared on the deck, nose pressed against the sliding glass door looking much like a Dalmation. Rotten scoundrel!

With only a half a cup of coffee down my gullet, and exasperated for the tenth time this week (and it is only Wednesday), I ran to get some dog towels to rectify the results of her scatheful behavior.

Some things just never change!

This is how I found Pearl Bailey this morning, apparently exhausted from her tussle with Pink Octopussy. One look at the marrow bone in line tells me it will become her next prey.

The house is quiet now with a light rain falling outside. These pregnant clouds prevent our resident diva from frolicking outside in her tropical Shangri-La. All this lends to her becoming bored and wanting to seek out another worthy and unassumed victim.

I am going to let her sleep for now while I enjoy my morning coffee. I am sure by day’s end she will have provided me with enough fodder for at least another chapter!

Meet Ella Fitzgerald, also known in this household as Harry Barker. She is a rascal, delightful in many ways, but a true scamp at heart.

Even though a sturdy breed, Ella takes the wrap for a lot of things around here, Pearl Bailey sees to that! They are perfect partners in crime these two. Ella is a timorous soul, a bit afraid of her own shadow at times, so she is content in letting Pearl Bailey take the lead. It is apparent to me, however, that Ella still has not figured out that Pearl Bailey is hanging her out to dry!!

I tried to explain to Ella about yesterday’s Milk Bone caper, but she just cocked her head and stared back from that adorable face of hers (that is when I captured this shot!) I don’t think my message rang true with her.

Funny how one dog can react to you and another will remain motionless. With Pearl Bailey, I can say most anything ~ I could recite the Gettysburg Address, read her a recipe, scold her, sing to her, have a conversation of great length – and she would get it all!

With Ella, however, you just never know!

OK, so don’t be horrified, Pearl Bailey is fine. Even though her overdose on Milkbones left her rendered temporarily immobile, she’s fine … and back to her daily pursuit of devouring lizards as appetizers, believe me and don’t be fooled!

For those of you who have ever owned a retriever, you know this type of food obsession is common place. Retrievers are chow-hounds. They never miss a meal. In this instance, Pearl Bailey, having been bored out of her mind with the torrential rains of late, took it upon herself to seek out a satisfying between meal snack. Now mind you, the Milkbones were not really in an accessible place. In fact, it would have taken quite a bit of acrobatic agility for a dog to reach them. But that would only be true of other dogs, not Pearl Bailey. This demon dame is a regular Houdini! And one that can not be trusted under any circumstance.

Anyway, this is how I found her – in Carb-Overload and dreaming of something fantastic. I shook her out of her coma with words of “…what’s this all about?” She simply raised her head and spoke to me with her eyes, ‘It wasn’t me,’ she said, ‘It was Ella…’. Exasperated, I walked away shaking my head in dismay. Children!

Sittin’ on the Screen Porch…